[From August 20] I have a friend who just fell a ways down a mountain. She didn't get hurt. I relaxed into the fall, she said. I'm having to relax into the fall, too. I noticed the aspen leaves changing this morning, as I pulled a shawl around my shoulders. I experienced the sensation of change with my eyes and the chill-induced goose eggs on my arms and I didn't like it because I've had a wonderful summer and don't like things to change. Next my mind had a thought: This is not good. This is cold. I don't like this. Next: action. I dove into busy work. Against the rapidly changing backdrop of an autumn sky, my ego plays the role of a tearful mother. She sees things changing around her and decides to bronze the be-jesus out of every moment -- every love, every bit of joy. That way, maybe we can hang onto things.
So today I broke the pattern. I relaxed into the fall.
